Early days
The intandem service matches volunteer mentors with young people aged 8–14 who are care-experienced. They meet up with their mentor for one hour a week to take part in activities, giving them a chance to make positive connections with reliable adults. Kate Spurway was matched with Christopher when he was 11 and although the requirement is to volunteer for only one year, Christopher has been happy to have her in his life ever since.
Kate says, “At the beginning, Christopher wasn’t easy! As soon as I met him, I knew he had undiagnosed ADHD. He was upfront, outspoken. He’s very black and white in his thinking. There were times it was a challenge. But I could also see he’s a creative, gentle soul.”
Christopher’s own reflections of that time in his young life are disarmingly honest: “I was a real nightmare, but I’ve managed to sort myself out now. Going on the activities like go-karting kept me out of the street and out of trouble.”
“I was a real nightmare, but I’ve managed to sort myself out now. Going on activities like go-karting kept me out of the street and out of trouble.” Christopher
But the work Christopher has done on himself has been about much more than just taking part in activities. With Kate’s prompting, setting goals has become a part of the work they have done together, and it’s that goal setting that has made a difference.
“Right from the start, he knew what his first goal would be – ‘I want to make friends’, says Kate. “But he needed some guidance, so we’d talk about that. We’d go to the park and watch other young people interacting with their friends and discuss how they were being with each other.
“Now, he’s got so many friends. It makes me so proud and pleased for him.”
“All the activities Christopher wanted to do were adrenaline-based!”
– Kate
Growing through connection
Six years in, the relationship between the two has developed into something that’s vital for both of them. “I’ve been alongside Christopher in different times,” says Kate. “He has been in crisis – he had to leave his house and was sleeping on a floor of a relative. They said to me, ‘You’re his first port of call.’”
For Christopher, it’s also been a process. “The more I got to know Kate, the better it was. She’s a good listener,” he says.
“There more I got to know Kate, the better it was. She’s a good listener.” Christopher
When asked for three words to describe Kate, he says, “I’m going to say a word I just learned yesterday – conscientious. Also, friendly and loving. She’s more like an auntie now.”
Now, Christopher has settled on a huge dream. He says, “My uncle took me to see a big-name DJ play and when I saw it I just thought, ‘This is what I want to do’, and it started from there.”
Supporters play their part
Quarriers annual Children’s Appeal raises funds to provide activities, helping young people make great memories and relax, as well as access hobbies and develop skills.
When Christopher’s interest in DJing grew, Kate and the team at the intandem service were able to access funding for Christopher to attend six sessions at a music studio where he could practice DJing skills.
“Christopher is an amazingly talented young person who over the past year has overcome many challenges.The cost of the music sessions is more than the service budget can afford.”
Excerpt from the first application.
“Christopher is an amazingly talented young person who over the past year has overcome many challenges.The cost of the music sessions is more than the service budget can afford.”
Excerpt from the first application.
Christopher not only found his talent but found a new focus and determination. Last year, he was signed to a leading DJ agency and with the help of further practice sessions, secured his first paid gigs.
He says, “The equipment at the studios is professional equipment so it means I’ve been able to practice, and that’s helped me to get gigs. I’ve played five events in the space of a year, and hopefully I just keep skyrocketing. I come and practice before I have a gig – I need to make sure I’m on my A game!”
Even though thumping beats are not exactly Kate’s cup of tea, she can see the flame it has lit in him. None of it would have been possible without the funding.
Kate says, “By helping him get access to the DJ practice sessions, the people who have donated to create the Children’s Appeal have done something amazing. They have not only helped Christopher develop skills he just couldn’t have had access to otherwise, but they’re also helping Christopher feel that his choice to do music is valid.”
A bright future
Christopher now hopes to start a course in music production later this year. It’s just one element of a life that is taking a different course than it might have without the support he’s had. He says, “Once you’ve set out your goals, you have to follow through. I have to put in the work now to get to where I want to be – a famous DJ and producer!”
Kate says, “Christopher was on the brink of becoming a problem for society. Now, he’s the youngest person signed up by the Mono Events agency. He’s just been to Liverpool with a huge bunch of friends for his birthday. Being paid for gigs has given him a real-world feedback loop and that means he has had the confidence to stay on at college. He’s only looking forward.
“He has done it all, and I’m incredibly proud of him.”
Christopher feels having a mentor can only be a positive thing for any young person. He says, “Kate loves that I’ve managed to do this and I’m not doing what I used to do. My mum is happy that I’ve managed to do this instead of what some boys my age are doing. When you’re getting a mentor, you don’t know them and you might not be up for it, but I’d say to any young person in that situation, go for it, have an open mind, give it a chance – you might get a Kate.”
